Kindness and empathy

It's been so long since I wrote here.

I imagine that the more time passed, the more difficult it became to come back to it.

We have had some immensely difficult weeks lately. Times when my Umami was hard to find. Maybe I should have kept sharing regardless, but I didn't.

After all this storm, I feel more calm in my heart. It feels good.

I heard some time ago that the empathy you receive when you are going through a difficult situation really helps you deal with it.

I think back to the very beginning, to my own postpartum hospitalization at Ste-Justine.

Every time we came back to my room at the end of the day, a nurse came to see us and asked how we were doing. But not just a trivial How's it going? which we want the answer to be Yes, to quit as soon as possible. No. A real How was your day?

The first night it happened, I almost felt bad answering because there was so much to say. But the nurse never made us feel bad at all. She spent probably 30 minutes with us and it made us really feel good. And it was the same with at least 3 different nurses. I understood that when they came to take my vital signs, they also came with the real intention of being there for us emotionally as well.

We all hear about the shortage of staff and despite everything, they were there fully for us. Although it was most likely outside the scope of their usual work. I still can't get over having experienced so much empathy and kindness. I didn't think it was possible. And yet, that's what I experienced.

This is why, despite the atrocity of the event, I managed to see the beauty in it, the gifts. Really, my experience at that hospital completely changed the course of things.

And when I needed to look for a new job, I went to look at the offers from the CHU Ste-Justine Foundation. And I got a job there. Because it is so immensely important what this hospital accomplishes, I also wanted to add my contribution to the cause.

I've been working there for two months now. I feel like my son sent me a nice gift with this job. I also feel like I'm getting closer to him there. From the luminous time I spent there with him.

I still don’t believe how my team is so great with me. Just before a meeting that was stressing me out a lot, my manager took the time to finish our call by telling me that she would be thinking of me very much. The next day, she wrote to me to find out how I was doing. I am so aware how rare it is and I am so grateful for it. To ask such a question is to be prepared to live with a difficult answer. And it's really not all the bosses who would have been comfortable. I can freely talk about Alexandre with her and it's crazy how precious it is to me.

I am really lucky to have wonderful people to surround me with their kindness and their love. It really changes the course of things.